I’m a romantic girl, I won’t lie. Open doors for me, lead me into places, offer your arm, pull out my chair, compliment me; I will eat it up and then carry some in a foil shaped as a duck to take home with me and keep for at least a couple of weeks.
The Queen’s Act
Unfortunately people in Kenya apparently never heard the term romantic outside of soap operas. Ask anyone today who is in a relationship what they think romance is and every Cuando, Secreto, Soy Tu Duena crap character will fall from their lips. And then I facepalm and tell my brother that’s the reason I will never be in a relationship. I don’t want a Juan Miguel although Jose Miguel (Soy Tu Duena) is quite attractive in a realistic manner.
Some women, for some reason want such characters as their men. Someone who will tolerate and even expect their dramatics, weird weaves, garish makeup and ill-fitted styles. They want someone who will cry to show sensitivity even though the moment they do see a man cry they’ll ridicule him for being a woman(warped psyches). They want someone rich and loving and spewing lines like without your kiss I’ll die. Yes, there truly was a line as such in a soap.
When the said some-women realise their men will never be the men in their novellas, they don’t care much for them. They treat them badly and most times insignificantly. They in turn treat themselves carelessly because they have no one to impress. Their dream lovers are nowhere in sight so why spruce oneself up?
This is my bane. Women want to be treated like queens but because their fairytale princes and kings don’t exist, they don’t play nor dress the part. They don’t walk with the posture of a queen which is (frankly speaking) head, boobs and butt up and out. They don’t act like a queen which is composure at least ninety percent of the time they are alive no matter the situation and a smile. Beauty isn’t attractive without a smile. Instead, they stoop and slouch and walk like ducks without the grace of being birds. The some-women barely smile and seem in perpetual unhappiness, like using forty-two muscles of your face to frown will make anyone remotely like your prince approach you.
It’s not a theory that a lack of acting the part evokes expected reaction in the sex you’re trying to attract. Case in point is some guy who is barely married two years and his wife has turned from a slightly made up lady to a troll. She wears old stockings for a cap, doesn’t bother with a bra or posture so her breasts are southward bound, she doesn’t bathe daily and dresses in old tracksuits and t-shirts and ripped socks. She wears and old nightgown to bed with the same stockings on her head. Needless to say, she’s not healthy either. The husband doesn’t come home most nights because what he’s coming home to is not attractive. He even described it as repulsive and wonders if it’s too soon to divorce her ass.
I wouldn’t be surprised if the wife is busy grumbling to her friends over facebook or unlimited texts that her husband isn’t the person she thought he was and the sex is mediocre and infrequent and she’s thinking he’s having an affair because he’s not home when she’s going to bed.
We all see what can be done here to save this marriage but as we all can see so can most not see it in themselves. What would it hurt dear some-women, to go to Woolworths and get your bra size fitted? Before you moan about money and time go on a Saturday with five hundred bob to buy two bras. A good bra gives support and confidence like nonsense. Get the right bra size, buy a couple of pretty underwear as your first step. Start walking with your head high and your back straight. If you’ve been slouching a long while, it will be uncomfortable at first but it gets more comfortable in a couple of days and even natural. Smile a little. You don’t have to be all teeth and gums to smile. Just pull a small uplifting curve on your lips and feel good. Even if nothing good is happening in your life, just smile a little and you’ll feel you can handle it. Then go to your hairdressers and instead of getting another synthetic weave, try your natural hair for a couple of weeks. It doesn’t hurt and plaiting the hair is actually a work out for your arms at night which help out your breasts in being buoyant a few more years.
It may all seem useless and futile especially if you live with a Neanderthal of a man but what if that Neanderthal is waiting for a queen to show herself in order for him to treat you as such? It’s not far fetched to think a man needs a few signals to understand that he needs to step up and put some effort in the relationship to maintain his end as well. And even if the Neanderthal doesn’t sprout an armour immediately, you shouldn’t give up the queen’s act. It will make you feel great; and eventually you’ll be great.
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